How to Get from Where You Are to Where You Want to Be by Cheri Huber

Author:Cheri Huber
Language: eng
Format: epub, pdf
Tags: ebook, book
Publisher: Hay House
Published: 2000-09-30T16:00:00+00:00

Working with Subpersonalities

People often ask two questions when confronted with the notion of subpersonalities: “Can you live without them?” and “How can I get rid of them?” (Please note that these questions themselves arise from our conditioning.)

Some schools of psychology work not toward getting rid of the subpersonalities, but toward integrating them, enabling them to “grow up” into one whole, unified personality. I have never felt the need to do anything with them except recognize and enjoy them. I think that our lives would be diminished by the loss of any aspect of ourselves. If I were to idealize anything, it would not be living without subpersonalities, it would be having free access to all the possibilities within a human being. Our difficulty is not with having various identities, it is the failure to recognize them for what they are, and, due to our lack of awareness, getting stuck in them. Many people are reacting from 2-year-old, 4-year-old, or 13-year-old survival strategies in situations that could definitely benefit from the presence of an adult!

While working with people and their subpersonalities, I have observed that those who attempt to get rid of an aspect of themselves are never successful. A subpersonality exists because someone tried to do away with a natural response. The subpersonality is an intelligent defense against anyone, including ourselves, permanently altering who we are. An attempt to eliminate a part of ourselves is thwarted by its “going underground.” The person is simply unable to recognize the subpersonality and it goes right on doing its work of protecting them. Here are two examples.

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